Ninja Turtle: Yeah, I know.
Arist: A-good. I know a lot of you-a teenagers get this-a wrong.
Ninja Turtle: Well I never would, dude. Cause it’s my name, too!
Artist: You’re-a named Michelangelo?!
Ninja Turtle: You know it!
Artist: You seem-a like a fun-a guy.
Ninja Turtle: I’m sort of a party dude!
Artist: You are-a some sort of half-human, half-turtle, yes?
Ninja Turtle: You nailed it, dude. Me and my brothers were turtles and then some ooze got on us and now we’re crime-fighting teenage turtle ninjas. And we’re named after famous artists for no apparent reason.
Artist: I noticed before I arrived-a, you were-a doing battle with a man made of metal, with-a metal claws, no?
Ninja Turtle: Yeah, dude. That’s Shredder. That guy is always giving us trouble.
Artist: You-a do not wish to do battle with him?
Ninja Turtle: No way, man. We just want to hang out in the sewer and eat pizza. But don’t you dare put anchovies on that pizza! Don’t do it. Don’t fucking do it!
Artist: I-a will not put anchovies on-a your pizza.
Ninja Turtle: Good.
Artist: You are-a familiar with my work, yes?
Ninja Turtle: Yeah, I like the one on the ceiling where God and Adam are about to fuck?
Artist: Yes-a, the Sistine Chapel, where God and Adam are-a moments from-a making love.
Ninja Turtle: And also that statue of the guy with the small penis.
Artist: Yes, David. They all-a have the small penises in my work, yes?
Ninja Turtle: Because you’re insecure about the size of your own.
Artist: A-yes! It is-a so small. Like that of a turtle.
[The Ninja Turtle gives the Artist a look like he’s angry, but then breaks out laughing. They both do.]
Ninja Turtle: Like that of a turtle indeed!
[More laughter. The Artist reaches out his finger towards the Ninja Turtle, hoping he will reach out his finger too. And this is where we leave them.]